Maternal Instinct.

I have felt nothing but relief since my son ran away, well once I got over the initial anger and worry. Shouldn't my maternal instinct be kicking in?

While I do feel unconditional love for him, I also dread the thought of him coming home again. God that sounds cold but that's how I feel.

It must be a sign of the times when a mother can't bring herself to miss her teenage son.

I feel these thoughts are so evil I can't bring myself to speak them out loud or share them with anyone in my life. But I had to put them down somewhere they're tormenting me.